Harassment. I’m sure this is nothing new for almost all women out there. I’d bet you all have stories of being groped, leered at, obscene things being shouted (or whispered). The list goes on.
It should make us angry. Every time.
But often it’s so easy to brush off because it’s so commonplace - “oh, some dude got way into my personal space at a show.” It happens all the time.
All of us (women as well as men) should be outraged.
“Both harassment and rape are the results of a culture that teaches men that women exist solely for them, their desires.” -Full Frontal Feminism
“Beyonce - Run the World (LIES)” This video is so true that it almost pains me. Almost. Watch it if you give a damn about females in general. You miiight learn something.
this is terrific. take 5 minutes out of your day and watch it.
also, she refered to the description as ‘in my pants’. nerdfighter!? yes please. we need more nerdfighters like her and less uneducated 14 year old boys.
Rape culture and the accompanying rape schedule that all women live their lives on one way or another (taking the longer bus route home instead of the el, walking with your keys in your hand, etc.) are the result of a society that teaches women not to get raped, instead of teaching men not to rape.
Women are not raped because they’re wearing short skirt, or are drunk, or are flirting. Women are raped because they’re in the presence of a rapist.
You know what? Fuck it. I’m copying the whole thing here and putting my comments in-line. The outrage commences.
The West Wing makes everything better. One of my favorite scenes from the whole show. The video itself is not super great quality, but it is a great discussion of feminism and the various interpretations of it.
“With that, I’m going to get a cupcake.”
A friend just sent this to me and I got about halfway through before I literally had to move away from my laptop or else I would have thrown it. Everything about this makes me angry in a really visceral way.
Taking it apart, clip by clip:
0:11 - Okay. Lost me already. Anyone, anyone who uses ”cunt” in a derogatory or hateful way loses my respect immediately. I’m kind of uncomfortable with it being used at all, but I give some leeway to women who are attempting to reclaim it.
0:30 - Another one. You, sir, are an asshole.
0:57 - Can I just say this whole thing reminds me of a Henry Rollins quote? (I can’t remember which book it’s from for the life of me.) “If i was a woman these days, i’d be killing motherfuckers. my handgun would never cool and my hands would be covered in testicular blood.” Kind of like a revenge fantasy.
1:26 - I’d like to remind everyone that an estimated 100-140 million women and girls are currently living with the effects of female genital mutilation (FMG) which consists of removing the clitoris, the labia minora, or narrowing the vaginal opening or some combination of those. FMG is generally “performed” between infancy and 10 years old. In Africa, 3 million girls are at risk for FMG every year. Where’s the outrage? *stats come from WHO
1:38 - It’s not okay. I think, though, that it happens because women are so often the victims. Men are privileged. But in this instance, the roles were reversed. And that’s different. Also, I don’t think you’d get an overwhelmingly positive response if you took a poll and said, “Is it acceptable for a woman to cut off her husband’s penis?” I think just about everyone (sociopaths excluded) agrees that harming other people is bad.
1:48 - The situation is reversed all the time. Women are mutilated and beaten and raped and murdered all the time. There is no uproar. No one is calling for anyone’s head on a pike. Usually all that happens is victim blaming, “what was she doing out so late?” “why was she alone?” “what can you expect if you go out wearing that?” etc. etc. This guy’s argument is faulty and a fabulous example of male privilege and rape culture.
2:23 - Holy shit. Have you ever heard of Battered Person Syndrome? I know that it’s being questioned as a legal defense for a number of reasons currently, but still. If someone’s being abused, especially intimate partner violence, what sort of state of mind are they in? Probably not the same one as the guy who kills his wife so he can get her life insurance (or whatever Law & Order plot you want). The victim who’s been abused might think (and legitimately so) that there is no escape except to kill the abuser. Is it okay? No. And it’s not like she should have a parade thrown for her, but it’s not just a standard cold-blooded homicide. If the jury can’t agree that she is 100% guilty of whatever the charges were beyond all reasonable doubt, then she gets acquitted. Welcome to the legal system. And yes, that IS justice. In a situation like that, I’m not sure she should go to prison - maybe something more along the lines of a psychiatric institution so she can receive treatment. And, for the record, a guy who abuses his wife physically and emotionally is NOT just an asshole like you’d call someone who cut you off in traffic. He is a spousal abuser, a perpetrator of intimate partner violence, and generally a terrible excuse for a human being. Statements like “Oh, so his wife who killed him says he was an asshole who beat her” are a perfect example of rape culture.
*Also, I don’t think it’s necessarily a good thing that people get so passionately enraged about cases where we don’t know all of the facts.
3:14 - how obnoxious is this guy? If you’re going to lecture on gender issues, get a little background knowledge first. Male privilege all over the place. Women generally aren’t the abusers in heterosexual relationships, so that’s why it’s incredibly rare to hear of a man who kills his wife because she was abusing him.
3:45 - Men are already empowered. Also, everyone has a facebook fan page, every inane and ridiculous cause has supporters.
4:28 - I think just about every feminist would agree that chopping off a guy’s dick is unwarranted. But I think that maybe, just maybe, the reason why the women on The Talk and in the audience were laughing about it is because when you think about it abstractly and without all the horrifying bloody visuals, it’s a little empowering but only in a symbolic sense. Women are violated by men so often, we live our lives on a rape schedule, and then to see a woman violate a man in such an outrageous and crude manner, it’s a bit like “finally, the roles are reversed.” It’s that revenge fantasy thing again. Now, I’m not condoning this at all. No person would. But if you don’t think about it as a reality but merely a hypothetical/fictional situation, it’s not as disturbing. Do you get what I mean? Because I’m really trying here and I’ve got the ideas, but I’m having a hell of a time getting those ideas into words. So if this is still confusing, let me know and we’ll hash it out.
4:57 - Again with the male privilege. This is about one incident of a woman violently and brutally maiming her husband. Do you know how many women are violently raped, killed, beaten, injured, maimed every day? I don’t, actually. But I’d bet it’s a lot more than one. If this guy had as much outrage about each and every one of those women, then I could take him seriously.
5:25 - Ah, a clip from The Talk. Yes, it IS different. Because men getting violated and injured in such an extreme and humiliating way is not every day news. Unlike when it happens to women.